Article 50, Brexit, David Davis, France, Parody

‘Le Journal Français’ of a beleaguered, blow-in, brexiteer Lord – – a #Brexit Parody

This parody blogpost was written on June 4th 2018

France, picturesque city hall of BeynacLast week it emerged that Lord Lawson, who chaired the Vote leave campaign, has applied for a residency permit in France to allow him to continue to live there after Brexit.

We have received, anonymously, the following pages from the diary of another British Lord who also lives in France. We publish them in the hope of offering an insight into the many problems facing these latter day, beleaguered Brexit migrants.

Sunday:

Had lunch at our local restaurant, La Folie des Anglais. The chefs, Michael and Sabine, had prepared a special menu in my honour which they called Brexit: A la Recherche du Temps Perdu. Michael explains that it is nouvelle cuisine, but with a traditionalist twist.

Starters were a choice between Paté A Les Kippers or Consommé David Davis.

I had the pate. It promised a lot but really delivered little. Quite a disappointment. Madame had the Consommé David Davis. It looked appealing but turned out to be thin and lacking substance. All froth and no broth. Chef apologised, said he had used a new, untested technology to make it. Probably needed a few more years’ work for it to all come together. At least twenty, I snorted. Still, I could see how it could tempt those who pretend to understand food but really don’t.

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Brexit, Data Protection, Data transfers, GDPR, Macron, Parody

“Talking to the Board”: A #Brexit Fable

This blog was written on February 3rd 2018.

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From the hotel window he could see across the roofs of Fisherman’s Wharf to Alcatraz, with the Golden Gate Bridge off in the background. Images that evoked The Rock and Bullitt or, for those with longer memories, the TV series The Streets of San Francisco, with Karl Malden and a very young Michael Douglas.

But James “Jim” Johnson wasn’t there to engage in remembrances of movies past or to admire the view. As the UK Executive Director of 4Zero, one of the US’s leading transnationals in the IT space, he was there to pitch to a board committee on a new $500m+ project, with around 1,200 jobs, to be located in Europe, developing state of the art computer security systems, vital for governments and businesses at a time when terrorist and state-backed cyber guerrilla war campaigns were the stuff of daily life.

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Brexit, Parody

A Parody: The #Brexit Tapes… inside a fictional Cabinet Brexit Committee…

Following our in-depth analysis of the negotiations: Brexit: Taking Stock, in last week’s blog: we thought we might offer a humorous take on the what many see as the at times almost farcical nature of much of the UK government’s approach to Brexit.

This post is written in that light-hearted spirit. We will return to our more usual considered critical analysis of the process and the negotiations from next week. Enjoy and feel free to share

Cabinet roomTHE BREXIT TAPES (?)

The scene: A British Brexit cabinet subcommittee

The cast of characters:

  • Davis: Davis (David “Danger” Davis, head of the Brexit Expeditionary Force, tasked with extracting the UK from the EU)
  • BoJo: Boris “BoJo” Johnson, Secretary of State for upsetting foreigners
  • The Govey: The Environment Secretary and one time “man who would be king” and then the man would be a political assassin.
  • Fox: Dr Liam Fox, Minister responsible for trying to make trade deals with former colonies and places as far away as possible. The fourth member of a gang of three.
  • Hammond: “Big Phil” Hammond, the moneyman and middle man. Sits on the fence with both ears to the ground.
  • The Maybot: The hapless Prime Minister. Is in the chair for the meeting, but not in control. This is effectively a non-speaking role. The others only let stay in place because they cannot agree among themselves who should replace her. She can ask questions. Just about.

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